Mmmmmh, Dear readers, it is called season of love and not season of making love. And you sister wey dey spread leg anyhow, you be rumour dem dy spread abi? How are you even sure you are the Main chick.
That brother, Yes!! Yes You!!, you know ya self, last falantine you bought her iphone 6, this year you are buying iphone 6s plus, you never pay your school fees, your parents sell land plus including borrowing of money to make up your school fees and u are using it to do love, May your ancestors forgive you and curse you IJN. Shebi after giving her the iphone 6s plus, she just give one 30 secs kisss, plus one 45 degrees hug and when you want to go down via the coveted coblalamine pathway every guy who bought falatine gift would like to enjoy today.....She will just tell you..Baby am on my period. My brother if you experience that today, just know that the ancestral spirits are angry with you.
Ehe bros, you’ve promised to buy an Mbano Island for that girl, to take her shopping at Dubai near Orile, and your mother have not eaten even one single Aba Titus fish from you, I shake my head three times for you. When the Lord shall come, all those expenses you incurred in the secret shall be made open. I’m just wondering what you will come back as if the Senate in heaven passes this Bill of Reincarnation. I hope you know you will come back as Goat!!!
Ehe Oga Titus, You’ve lined out 5 side chicks in addition to your main girlfriend abi? Chai, I just pity you. The day your side chicks will remember you, you will know that “because cat sabi swim no make am cat fish”. They will make your life so miserable and even play your Father and marry your Fore Father just to be your Step Fore-Mother. Mind yourself o, Naija no be Eritrea. Let sleeping dogs lie.
Ehe Sister, you send nude pictures to that bros abi? I just don’t know how to rate your Romantic approach whether on the scale of being wise or not having sense. Your mates are breaking the internet with their nudes and making money and you are sending nudes to somebody at Oshodi who will end up sharing it with his friends at Egbeda. You think guys are selfish like you who share your nude with only one guy? Mtcheeewwww. Channel you nude picture to something productive, there is nude modelling anyway since you want to be the Eve of your village.
Ehe sister, you share your kpekus to every guy in your neighborhood and you still say you want a spiritual man, a man who is spirit filled. I hope you know Spirit Husband and Native Doctors are available too. Well to increase your worth, change your location. After all ashawo na virgin for new street. Keep enjoying.
Lols, guys, valentine shouldn’t be the only day to show love, but still show love to someone and make it worthwhile. You can email your valentine hangout story to us at firstname.lastname@example.org (Major Boobs) or email@example.com.
Thanks for stopping by to read. Keep smiling and shining.
We are wishing you the best of the day.
Major Boobs x Ice
Dear concrete wall, my eyes still wonder why you are so grey. You're strong and tall and hard as rock but grey still colours you.
Oh concrete wall, how does it feel at day when no one dares. To touch your face, but looks at you as shrivers speak their fears.
The night must bring such bliss to you, as cold winds caress your face and then the folks who once didn't care, yearn for your embrace.
Dear concrete wall, do you feel sad that you let no one in or rather you feel somewhat glad, protect the jewel within.
I've heard before but still I'll ask, Is it really worth the climb? Eventually when I scale through will I be pleased with the sight behind.
Dear concrete wall, i bet it hurts when piece by piece you fall. Cause then you'd have to take comfort in the hits of a wreaking ball.
Dear concrete wall, I sit and stare and throw these stones at you. But yet they fall without a care, just pleased that they met you.
Dear concrete wall, I know for sure I'll build you up one day. And waves of pain shall reach the shore but I'll be faraway.
2. Green Screens
Modern, fresh and very edgy, recent Spring 2016 collections like Bally reaffirmed the recurring trend in street style for sunglasses; bright green reflective lenses. Bright green-lensed sunglasses are the perfect accompaniment to crisp whites, blacks and work remarkably well with graphic prints. Duskier greens flatter darker features and brighter limes register well with blondes. For an injection of colour, look no further than the metallic glare of bright green shades, however be mindful of your other accessory colours when attempting the trend; keep things subtle and aligned.
3. Transparent Lenses
The recent transparent lenses trend is the modern take on a seventies-esque aesthetic. Particularly appealing in burnt peaches and filmy blues, this 2015 sunglasses trend can easily be incorporated in a range of casual looks, provided the hues of your clothing are within the same colour family a la Bottega Veneta Spring 2016. Be mindful of your skin tone and features when nominating a see-through hue for your shades and try on different pairs for a better indication for how it will register with your face shape and features, given they come in a range of shapes and styles.
4. Round Frames
Perhaps one of the most beloved street style staples, the 2015 round sunglasses trend is the modern answer to its twenties’ predecessors. Amazingly suited to formal wear and tailored blazers, round sunglasses are a nostalgic wink to older decades’ conceptions of its shape. Round sunglasses are best suited to those with oval, oblong or square shaped faces; however are problematic on a round face as they mimic its proportion. Keep things contemporary with the various modern colours these frames come in, like the fluorescent red featured in the recent Moschino Spring collection, however a classic black pair is the ultimate in versatility.
Ah, the wayfarer: cool, classic, easy. An iconic favourite and beloved staple for effortlessly styled clothing, its squarish shape is evocative of its fifties heritage. Canali cemented its stay in 2015 with its playful combination with grey tailoring. The wayfarer works well with most face shapes, and in particular can create a more elongated, angular definition for those with roundish faces. You can never go wrong with a quintessential black pair, however more modern, graphic pairs featured in Ray Ban provide a contemporary alternative.
6. Tortoise Shell
Whilst tortoise shell sunglasses have been featured in the recent Burberry and Fendi collections, its humble beginnings as a traditional favourite are evidence of its classic undertones. As usual, be mindful of your face shape when choosing the right frame for you and always consider the colouring of your clothing when styling the classic favourite. Incredibly friendly with navies, neutrals and whites, the brownish hue of the beloved tortoise sunglasses works best with traditional silhouettes. Maintain a contemporary edge with the newer rounder shapes of this trend.
Mmmmmh church Eliza!!! Lol, they say in the presence of the Most high there is fullness of Joy. But there are certain scenarios in church I want to comment on. It goes like this;
Sister Faith: Brethren Praise the Lord
Sister Faith: That hallelujah is too small for my God
And I'm like, who come be this one? Are you heaven's sound engineer? Lol, ANTIE let's keep praising him the way we can.
This also takes me to those brethren you will ask to pray and commit the offering given into the hands of the Most High and they will first lead in Service of Songs. Chai, brother abi sister, they said pray and not sing. Be precise in worship. I wonder how angel Michael will be looking at you with his sword.
Shout out to all those Igbo sisters that show off their English accent while singing Igbo songs. Sister you deserve a seat next to Angel Gabriel. Which one come be;
Email, email her, email her
Jehovah email her,
Anyinekele gymnastic email her, email her
Jehovah email her.
Lol frosh sister, we have heard, keep up the good work. That is exactly why Suarez bite people.
Ehe before I sign out, I want to say my mind once and for all. I'm part of those Christians that think that part of King David and Beersheba (Solomon's mum) in the Bible was actually a set up. How this woman no see anywhere for the whole kingdom to baff, na where Oga David dy come collect breeze she come dy baff. Lol, you sef bros David, must you do? Can't u bind the enemy? Lmao.
Lol, thanks guys for reading. See ya next time. We will running a valentine gist next time!!!
Wednesday, February 03, 2016